When it all comes down to it...

In the movie "Office Space" the main character recalls something a high school career counselor once told them when they were exploring career options. "If you had a million dollars, what would you do? That is what your job should be."

Although I don't think a satirical comedy should guide me life, that statement has been on my mind a lot lately. Every time I turn around, someone new is asking me "What are you going to do after graduation?" My preferable response would be to shout "I have no freakin idea, so leave me alone!" Instead, I simply laugh and say "That is the million dollar question." And it really is because it's all I think about these days.

From the time I was a junior in high school, I have flirted with the idea of becoming a journalist. That idea has diminished and rose again throughout the years, but it's something I always come back to. Here is the deal: being a journalist is not a fabulous career, and I am painfully aware of that. The money is poor, the hours are long, the public scrutiny is crushing, and damn it, it's hard. But for all of it's negatives, there is something delightfully addicting about this profession and it has captivated me in away I can't explain.

As I look for jobs, I become more aware of the field's competitive nature. I would love to move to a city right after college, however, it's more difficult than that. I don't have the experience for a metro paper, nor do those papers usually take recent grads. So I can stick with a grass roots publication or something smaller, which could be really fun. However, both types of jobs don't pay the type of salary it takes to live somewhat comfortably in a big city.

So I started looking at my options. I could do PR or some type of office work right away, just to get my feet wet. Those jobs don't pay real well, but better than what I would make at a newspaper. Plus, I like doing little things like running errands, scheduling and answering the phone. And those jobs are a heck of a lot easier to find.

But as fabulous as the corporate sounds, and it does sound tempting to me, something reminds me that isn't really what I want. Because when it all comes down to it, I am a story teller.

I tell stories, and it's what I have done since I was little. There is something so invigorating about telling a person a story that makes them cry, laugh, fume or simply smile. I have always been eager to be the information relayer, whether that information was that so and so are dating, the city council was working on such and such plan or that it was going to rain today.

As I think about jobs, I just know that I want to write and I want to work with people and I want to write about people. I guess that is where sports come in.

Last August, I had to cover media day for the Jackrabbit football team. I really didn't know much about the team, let alone the sport. Football games were for tailgating and socializing, that's it. Now I had to write about a team and their upcoming season without the slightest clue how to do it.

So that night I studied the roster, called friends who followed the team and read whatever I could about the team. As I walked to the football field for interviews with the players and coaches, my heart began to pound. I had never been this nervous for an interview before. I was shaking when I interviewed the first player, a sophomore receiver. His kindness quickly eased my nerves, and I got through six player interviews and one with the coach pretty neatly.

Later, I wrote two stories about the team's lack of maturity and tough schedule. The players I talked to had some overly optimistic goals for the season, like a conference title and a win over rival North Dakota State, but it captured my attention for the season. After their first game, my doubts seemed right as the team lost to a Division III school in a game the opponent dubbed "David vs. Goliath." Three losses later, and the team had pretty much killed all hopes of accomplishing their goals.

Then came McKneese. It was the ultimate comeback, as the team rallied from 14 minutes behind with five minutes in the game to win against a ranked team. The quarterback went for two, and the Jacks just sneaked by "the big guys." It was one of those "once in a life time" games. It happened three more times.

I remember sitting in the bleachers watching the Jacks play UC Davis, the second best team in the Great West. They were down going into the fourth quarter, but I knew it wasn't over yet. See the team had developed a "we believe" mantra that they followed throughout the season. They believed in themselves, and they believed they could win. My sports editor sat next to me during the fourth quarter as the stands had started to thin out with the increased wind and loosing score. But I stayed because I knew it was about to get good.

And it did. My sports editor told me half way through the quarter, "That team knows they can win this game." And they did. They came back and scored the winning touchdown with a little more than a minute. It was another one-point victory.

Afterwards, the team stood in front of the stands and clapped. They thanked the fans still there for believing.

That week I wrote a profile about the backup quarterback and his wife, a prominent runner for the SDSU cross country team. They were the super couple: good students, good athletes and good parents to a 1 1/2-year-old boy.

That is the week I decided to be a sports writer.

The Jackrabbits taught me about ups and downs. They showed me the beauty and thrill of competition. They taught me to hope and to believe. I make their story to sound like it deserves a motion picture script, it doesn't. But what it does is deserved to be told. I knew that I wanted to tell those stories.

I started writing for the Argus Leader sports' section. It isn't always riveting but I have covered some pretty good games, including a back-and-forth SkyForce game right after the team loss the best player in the D-League.

As I get deeper into my last semester at SDSU, I am constantly fighting with thoughts of what will I do come May. I just don't know. But what I do know, and it isn't much, is that I that I like to tell stories. It's the only thing that I can do halfway decent. So I guess when it all comes down to it, I am a story teller who likes sports.

More last firsts

Tomorrow is my last first day of school ever.

I walked into the Union the other day and realized that my time n that building is limited. I can walk in the building a thousand times before I die, but only a few times as a student. I love SDSU and all that it has done. But there is new things to do and new places to go. What I will do? Only the good lord nows.

Now, it's time to just do it.