God Works in Mysterious Ways

I had a horrible night at work, which is usually the norm these days. Anyways, when I got home I found this Web site in my mailbox. An unlikely source, my childhood best friend Heather, sent this to me. It's funny, I haven't seen her in years and yet sometimes I think we still know each other like we did when we were 6. This message was exactly what I needed on a day like this, or in my life at this point. Hope you enjoy!


http://www.eightprinciples.com

The goals

I have decided to put up a picture each time a post

so here is one of Scott and I in Poky.

I know that it may seem rather odd that I am posting so soon after another blog but I decided to make a list of goals and put them on my blog. So here is my lifetime goals.

Lifetime Goals

Run a marathon

Compete in the Ironman

Write a book

Visit all 50 states

Marry and start a family

Win a Pulitzer

Live the life God wants me to

Cover an Olympics

Be fluent in some language

Raise babies

Travel to Ireland, Austrailia, China, Alaska

Own a boat

Daily goals:

Pray more

Read more

Stop biting my nails

Appreciate life more

Value my friends and family

Stopy worring

Work harder

Swear less

Ok those are my goals. Maybe I'll update them as I go.

Missing all

(NOTE ABOUT THE PICTURE: Scott and I took this at the beach in Blackfoot. Not sure why, but I really like it.)

A few weeks before I moved to Idaho, a friend of mine told me I'd really appreciate South Dakota once I left. This friend had left the home state a few years earlier for the beauties of Florida. She told me that although the beaches are amazing, they'll never replace the glory of the plain state.

I knew she would be right, I just did know how right.

A couple of days ago, I made my first visit back to South Dakota. The first visit came a couple months earlier than expected and was a last minute decision. Basically, Scott had been planning a visit to potato land. He bought his ticket over a month ago, and was set to leave last Thursday. That morning he called and said his grandpa died and was unsure of what that meant for his trip. After four tear-filled back and forth hours and help from his wonderful sister-in-law, Lorienne, he was able to catch his flight that night but the trip would have to be cut a couple days short. My mother offered to pay for a ticket to go back with him for the funeral and I flew back on Sunday.

I was there only for two days, but as soon as we entered the state, I felt a deep sting in my stomach. I didn't want to leave again.

We spent most of the time in Milbank, but on Monday night we came back to Brookings. As we approached the town, I knew that once I saw a certain familiar shape in the skyline, I would lose it. And sure enough, once I saw the Campanile, I cried. As we drove through town, memories and tears swelled and I just lost it. Scott, who never really understands how to handle my over dramatic emotions, sat confused. He gave me a hug once we got to his place, but I don't think he could really understand how much I miss South Dakota. And him.

Leaving SD was something I have wanted to do for years, and now that I finally did it, it lacks all of the glamour I had envisioned. I am broke and lonely. Some days, I am full of ambition and hope, wanting to make a good life. And other days, I can't get out of bed and life seems mute.

I was talking to a friend yesterday who lives in Nashville, and we were discussing his future plans. He hopes to go back to SD to gain more experience in his profession. Then we started debating whether we really missed SD or just college.

Each day, I try to make the most out of my life in Idaho. And really, things aren't as bad I portray them in the paragraphs above. But sometimes, they feel that way. Life will get better, I know it will. This is a transition and a hurdle. I have said this before, and I will say it again, attitude makes a big difference. So I will pray and put on a better attitude, knowing that life will get better. I just have to make it happen.

Since I haven't blogged in a while I will do mini-updates in my life for all those deeply interested (all of two readers).

JOB

The job is an up and down basis. Some days I love it, some days I hate it. Some days I think I am getting it, some days I feel like I don't have a clue in the world. I know there is vast room for improvement, I just feel like I don't know how to improve. I guess improvement comes with time, and I need to be patient, but I just want to be better. My work load will drastically increase in a couple of weeks once the fall sports start. I am pretty sure that I will be handling mostly volleyball and cross country, with sprinkles of football.

My coworkers are good people, who I have learned a lot from. One of them, Dan, has become my movie buddy. I think he appreciates me being a woman so he has someone who will give him female advice. Tim, Kellis and Joe are also fun guys, though there aren't many other females at work I interact with. The paper just hired a new Web editor, and she seems very nice.

APARTMENT

My financial situation sucks, so I decided to get a roommate. I found a nice ISU student, Annabel, on a Web site. She is currently in Wisconsin, but will be moving back to Idaho in a few weeks. It will be very nice to have someone else's company, and split bills.

VISITORS

Amy and Faith visited me a couple of weeks ago, and it was exactly what I needed. We drank wine, ate chocolate, and had good old fashioned girl talk. We even went dancing at Charlies. It was a wonderful time. Scott was just here, and it was perfect. We went to the lake, miniature golfing and a few movies. Mostly, we spent time with each other. In a few weeks, my family is coming. I couldn't be more excited. My parents and both my brothers are coming, so I am excited to see them.

SCOTT

Long-distance relationships suck, and after all the depression and anxiety that I went through with Bryan, I vowed not enter in to another. Oh, but Scott Mueller is worth it. We talk on the phone everyday, and sometimes it's not pleasant conversations. But we love each other so much that the fight is always worth it.

Scott is definitely a different type of boyfriend than I have had before. He doesn't fall to my every want and need, and he doesn't put up with my crap. I feel my self start to develop habits and feelings that I had in past relationships, things that drove me and that person apart, but I try to snap out of it quicker. I want this to work, so I try to relax more and not let my insecurities and jealousy ruin our relationship. He is a wonderful man, and I hope someday in the near future, we'll live in the same town again.

I met his family at the funeral this week, and there were amazing. Meeting the family is always nerve raking, and usually I hit it off with them, but Scott's family was different. It felt more natural.

OK, so there is a quick update. I will do my best to keep this updated more, but sometimes with my job, the last thing I want to do is write.

God Bless to all.